lately, I’ve been surrounded by two extremes: those suffering from the god-complex and those hell-bent on underachieving. both types require attention, shitty situations, and are fueled with negative energy. perhaps you’ve also encountered the “i am so amazing/ this place would fall apart without me/ express your inadequate gratitude by permitting me to do absolutely nothing because work is for peasants” attitude. and maybe you’ve been unfortunate enough to also engage with the “meh/ typos galore/ i woke up like dis” asshole who can’t be bothered with a courtesy toilet flush in the shared workplace bathroom. as my blood pressure and heart palpitations will attest, i am steadily growing weary of my surroundings.
I’ve been playing bachelorette for a few weeks now with jon working out of state and have relished the solitude and opportunity for reflection. however, old habits die hard, and I find myself in one of three places: work, gym, or bed — in one of two moods: murderous or ready to die.
I recognize the darkness within my mind and struggle daily to find balance between bleak reality and hopeful living. perhaps my husband’s presence encourages me to be a softer soul and to utter kinder words. his love deserves a grateful heart; i am lucky to have his light fighting for goodness in my black, stone-cold universe.
in closing, i will leave you with one of my favorite comic strips, “pearls before swine.” consider thanking the people in your life who give you a hug after you scream “i hate everything” after you walk in the front door. we can’t live in extremes: the whole world doesn’t suck… just the majority of it and its inhabitants.